Joy: a unique species of nerd, posing as a human being. This creature has infiltrated society and is working her nerdling ways into the system to finally bring an end to capitalism and ressurect Stalin to reign supreme. So far, Joy's host body is 18 years old and resides somewhere in Canada. This country has been selected as a trial run before the capture of the USA and the British Isles. The nerd herself was selected at birth and the Joy parasite took control of the baby. Nowadays Joy can be found stealing toilet paper from public restrooms and hanging around the back of game shops to salvage discarded games from the trash can. She is wanted in 32 countries for various offenses such as public nudity, regicide, improper use of male sexual organs and harbouring illegal immigrants from Guam under her baggy clothing.
Guilty Filthy Soul
Anonymous asked: Any advice for those who have lost everything?
Look down at your body. Wiggle your toes. Shake your feet. Bend your knees. Move your hips. Squeeze your fists. Flex your biceps. Stretch your back out. Nod your head. Blink your eyes. Take a breath. Feel for your pulse. From this, conclude that you have many things. All is not lost.
Taylor Swift
Besides this photo being 100% unretouched, Swift is also sans-makeup. It appeared in People Magazine’s 2008 “100 Most Beautiful People” issue.
So much respect for Taylor for doing this. Since I’m generally out of the loop, I didn’t discover this until 4 years after it was done.
I find it laughable when women blame men for their love life issues. Seriously, if you’re having such terrible issues with men, you clearly have some vital personal shit to sort out.
- Stop going after men who you have nothing in common with or who you really don’t get along well with, just for superficial reasons, and then getting all “why me” when surprise, it doesn’t work out. You don’t have to be a medium to see that coming.
- Stop treating men who actually treat you decently as pawns and dragging them around by the ankles. Try actually, you know, giving them a chance. At the very least, you might make some friends.
- Take a ride on the god damn self-esteem engine and stop basing all your self-worth on what men think of you at every given time.
- Know yourself properly before trying to date someone. If your personality is based on fiction, your relationship will also be based on fiction.
How amazing! You will never forget that day, I bet.
I don’t think I could if I tried. It’s all so strange, it feels like a really vivid dream.
Last night, a distressed woman and her little daughter came to our door holding this tiny fawn. They said they had been walking on the beach next to our house, when their dog ran off and came back with the fawn in his mouth. After severely scolding the dog, they had no choice but to handle the fawn and attempt to help it. In case you don’t know, mother deer can reject their fawns if they detect the scent of humans or other predators on them. The woman asked to use our phone to call Wild Arc. The fawn was laying very still and her head was heavy on the woman’s arm. We were scared.
I wrapped the little creature in a towel and identified her as a girl. Wild Arc instructed the woman to take the fawn to a vet to have her looked at, in case the dog had injured her. Since the woman had to drive and her daughter was very young, I agreed to ride along and carry the fawn. My assistance turned out to be needed, as by the time we were in the car, the little deer was looking around, wriggling like crazy, and calling for her mama.
The vet told us that the fawn had come away unscathed. He instructed me to take the fawn back to the wooded area by the beach, and rub her down with dirt to try and rid her of human scent. Then, I was to leave her in a safe place. The woman dropped me off at home, and my mother gave her $20 for gas money, as her tank was dangerously low.
I did as the vet instructed, with help from my mom. As soon as we let her go, the fawn began half crawling, half wobbling up through the bushes to conceal herself. She couldn’t even walk, she was so new. We waited until we heard her settle, then we went back to the house.
A half hour later, we went back down to find the fawn had crawled all the way up the bank despite being unable to walk. We then watched her as she continued crawling several hundred yards uphill toward a wooded area behind a neighbor’s house. Part way up, a big buck emerged from the bushes.
He approached the fawn and sniffed her. Then, he began to prance around her, in big leaps, almost as if he was dancing. Then he stopped and looked at us, before slowly circling around us once, never looking away. Then, he disappeared into the trees.
The fawn wriggled on several more yards, before crawling into the bushes. By then, it was dark out. we’d done what we could do. The fawn’s fate was now up to nature, and we accepted that we’d never really know what happened to her after that. Her strength and determination despite her tiny size inspired me. I named her “Luminitsa,” a Romani name meaning, “Little light.”
The next day, just as my mom and I sat down to write the story of the fawn together, the big buck silently came and lay down outside our window.
If that weren’t mysterious enough, I opened the front door of our house a half hour later to discover my wallet on the doorstep, with a note next to it. The note read:
“I found your wallet on Cedar Hill X Road near Mount Tolmie last night. I’m happy I can return it to you :) - Spirit Daniels”
I hadn’t been anywhere near that location the night before. I didn’t even know I’d lost my wallet.
When I opened my wallet, not a single card or coin was out of place. When I opened the bill fold, which previously contained nothing but old receipts, there was a $20 bill.
My mom and I aren’t even going to bother to try and figure out the logic behind what happened last night.
